10 types of Internet Bios

I'm starting to get sick of the word 'Internet Bios' buuuuut they're so much fun, so here's another post on them. Here are Ten Types of Internet (mainly Instagram) Bios that you will have seen at least one in your life. (Now I sound like Blimey Cow.)

1. The Organised Bio
Example:丨INTJ 丨Lover of books丨24 丨British 丨John 1:1 丨Happily Married丨
That person that loves how uncluttered and organised her/his (let's be real, it's a girl) bio looks in comparison to the unorganised ones.

2. The Emoji Bio
Example: →👗👫💗😻🍁👸🌺🍦🍓🎹←
That person that thinks everyone will take the time to unclue what kind of personality s/he has by staring at the individual emoji's for ten minutes.

3. The Link Bio
Example: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Sweetest-Thing-Elizabeth-Musser-ebook/dp/B004XM3WA6/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1481093686&sr=8-1&keywords=the+sweetest+thing+elizabeth+musser
That person who uses their bio to get traffic elsewhere. These are usually short-term, because in the caption of one of the pictures someone will say 'link in the bio.' Why, by the way, not just put the link in the caption? (Or maybe that's not possible?)

4. The Short Bio
Example: Born with peculiarity.
That person that thinks s/he just nailed it on the Bio-writing department.

5. The Funny Bio
Example: I have no clue what to write here, so I guess I'll just take a time to be real with you guys and tell you that.
That person that attempts to make their page looks really attractive by making his/her bio really funny. 90% of the time the joke is very lame, but the fact that s/he devoted the oh-so-important-bio for wit must mean it's a very witty person.

6. The Confusing Bio
Example: 25/mdays!! ANNABELLE💘ง♡↑阝↟🌲థΔ∢ youtubedotcomeslashsomething /🌘०be happy↠ i love @cooldude💜
That person that's trying so, so, so hard to be really cool. Their bio ends up looking like a wreched mess.

7. The follow 4 follow Bio
Example: My name is Janice follow 4 follow no haters plz
That person that wants to be famous so bad s/he does it the desperate way and begs for followers. This is the kind of bio that makes me lose hope in humanity.

8. The Christian Bio
Example: *insert a Bible verse*
That person that gets their priorities straight.

9. The trying-to-fit-as-much-as-possible-into-one-bio Bio
Example: BLOGGER heresmyblogblogspot.com/Lover of rain💦/homeschooled/Downton Abbey/my fam♡/I sell things on Etsy heresmyetsy.com/In Christ Alone/I love doing the laundy/one of these was a joke😀
That person who has so much to say and grabs the oppotunity in the bio. S/he makes sure to attempt to add a little bit of everything; a bit of humour, a bit of linky-love, a bit of emoji-love, a bit of personal info. (I would probably be this person.)

10. The Artistic Bio
Example: 🌒 S T A R T 🌓 L I V I N G 🌔 F O R 🌖 L O V E 🌘
That person that takes hipster to a whole new level, putting spaces (or full-stops) between letters, and using very mythical-looking emojis to make their deep living advice look deeper.

Which one are you? :-)


  1. Yesss, this is accurate. #6 is far too frequent. Say, WHAT? xD

    MY bios are usually a blend of #1, #4, #9.

    1. I know, RIGHT? They look TERRIBLE and make no sense.
      Well, 1, 4 and 9 are the three I'd do the most too, so I like your choices. ;-)

  2. Hehe these are great! I'm probably number 9 😂

    1. I have the feeling a lot of people are number 9. :-)

  3. Haha, I like Blimeycow-esque posts.:P Ugh, #2 annoys me so bad. Just, use WORDS. And #7. Those make me cry.;) #3...YEAH.

    I would probably be #1 or #9.:)

    ~Rilla Blythe

    1. Me too. :-)
      I KNOW. The just-emoji bio... WHY. YOU HAVE THE ABILITY TO WRITE. SO WRITE.
      "Those make me cry"... same. :-)

  4. Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh . . . I don't know. I'd probably have #1, it looks nice and clear-cut and sensible. But I don't really know.

  5. You missed one! You missed one! ahem. ;) I actually have an instagram now and my bio is simply a quote from Jane Eyre with my blog link. What should it be called? "The literary bio"? I like that. HOW COULD YOU FORGET THAT ONE, NAOMI? ;)

    1. Oh yes! I could have thought of it! Sadie, Emma's sister, has a literary quote in her bio as well; as does Emma. WHY DID I FORGET THAT. :-P (Maybe I'll do a 'ten more' post haha. Because there's also the 'significant other' bio, which is like 'I LOVE MY HUBBY' and nothing else. :-P)
      The literary bio is awesome. :-P
      And I admit I already knew you had an Instagram, cuz I stalk Emma's and I saw you comment. :-)

    2. Hahaha, you should! That sounds great. :D

      I wondered if you knew. :) (-whisper- Get an Instagram so you can follow me and I can follow you! Follow 4 follow, and all that. ;))

  6. I'm probably like #4 or #9 XD But not just one either way.. I legit changed mine last night. YOU ALWAYS POST THIS KIND OF STUFF WHEN I CHANGE MY BIO xD

    1. You are so no.9, Julia. :-) Ohhh *runs off to read her new Bio*

    2. ohhhh realllllyyy? *pouts* I beg to differ. xD *waits to hear what you thought of my new bio*

    3. I really like the new bio. :-) It's quirky and cool and you.

  7. This was a very fun put together of yours! In my Blogger account, I guess I follow into "The Organized Bio." :) On Pinterest, I actually just have song lyrics, so I'm not sure which kind that is, but it's the only thing I could think of at the time. :) I am so dreadfully bad at bios, anyways. :)
    Love your blog look, by the way! I can almost feel the delicious chill of a gust of winter wind sweeping out of your blog and out of my computer onto my face.
    Lol, if that makes sense. :)

    1. Song lyrics are cool. I guess I forgot the 'quote bio.' :-) Now I think of it, I know quite a few people with a quote in their bio.
      Thank you!! That's quite a lovely analogy. :-)

  8. AHAHAHA. I think I'm number 4. :-P

  9. I'm changing my personal instagram one back to this which looks rather organised but i think I need a change.. any ideas?
    Future English Teacher | Jesus | Aussie | Violist | Alto | Ravenclaw | Period Dramas | Jane Austen | Musicals & Theatre | Hopeless Romantic | Doctor Who

  10. WHY DID NO ONE THINK OF DOING SOMETHING LIKE THIS?! Ah I loved reading this. I think My bio is really original and it's got a link!

    1. I KNOW. I was like, 'WHAA THIS DOESN'T EXIST YET. :-O' and quickly wrote it before anyone else could. ;-)

  11. None of the above. :) My bio is "I don't like social media, why is this so interesting to people? ooh tea!"

    1. That is totally the funny bio. :-)

    2. So it is! It is the ever so slightly sardonic division of the funny bio, and also slightly....ironic, since it doesn't actually exist anywhere. Not ironic, but I can't think of the word I want, so I'll go with ironic...dang what is that word?

  12. Like this! I have a very organized bio right now, I use to have a really lame/funny bio but it was just awkward.....😜

  13. Ahh... this post was practically perfect in every way....

    .....and ridiculously accurate. :D

    Hmm... well, I'd like to think I'd be #1, but I'm sure it'd end up being a mess and turning out more like #9. ;D

    ~Miss Meg

  14. I'm laughing so hard at the ridiculous amount of accuracy, and the fact that #1 is literally me. XD

  15. Dude, this was perfect. The short bio, and Christian bio and confusing bio - SPOT ON!


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