These last 3 days, I've been doing a lot of page-turning. I have read the colossal thing. It is read. I have done it. It is done.
I'm pretty proud of my Goodreads review, so I'm pasting it here for you.
My rating: 4 out of 5 stars.
I'VE READ IT.
Iiiii've read it!!!!! :-D
Goodness, how to review this! Like many, half of it bored me to death (not literally, although that would be fitting, considering how most of the characters end.) Like many, I thought a lot of it was very beautiful. It's epic. It's far to miserable and long, thus the four stars, but REALLY. Wow. It's a CLASSIC. I'm glad I've read it. :-D
Let me introduce the characters to you.
The Bishop: Kind Man. We know everything about him, even the sizes of all the objects in his bedroom.
Jean Valjean: Other Kind Man. One could call him the main character. Definitely acted by Hugh Jackman. Jean Valjean is SPLENDID. (Weird name to choose though, if that's your last time. That's like me being called Naomi Valnaomi.) (Spoiler: He dies, duh.)[ he dies, duh (hide spoiler)]
Fantine: Poor Girl. I learnt that she was blonde. I was SO angry at Victor Hugo for making her wait for Cosette and then die before seeing her. This book is UNFAIR. I TELL YOU. UNFAIR. (Spoiler: She dies, duh.)[ she dies, duh (hide spoiler)]
Javert: The tiger who always pops up. (Spoiler: He dies, duh.)[ he dies, duh (hide spoiler)]
Eponine: A Rough and 'yet Beautiful' girl who I FEEL SORRY FOR. There wasn't enough Eponine. I have a special bond with Eponine. (Spoiler: She dies, duh.)[ she dies, duh (hide spoiler)]
Enjolras: Probably my favourite character. Loves the colour red. Likes shouting. He's always shouting. But yet we all love him because he's beautiful and blonde and tall and angelically handsome. *Swoon* (Spoiler: He dies, duh.)[ he dies, duh (hide spoiler)]
Gavroche: I LOVE THIS BOYYYY. The only miserable and happy person in this book. Obsessed with guns. (Spoiler: He dies, duh.)[ he dies, duh (hide spoiler)]
Marius: Black hair. Dreamy. He only thinks about Cosette, and that makes him look like a bit of an idiot sometimes. (Spoiler: He almost dies, duh.)[ he almost dies, duh (hide spoiler)]
Cosette: Completely adorable and lark-y and sweet. A Very Good Girl. (Spoiler: She DOESN'T die! Like, at ALL! *goes away singing 'wonders of wonders, miracles or miracles.*)[ She DOESN'T die!!!! Like, at ALL! *Goes away singing 'wonders of wonders, miracles of miracles'* (hide spoiler)]
Some random things I liked:
1. The way the characters were described. I LOVED Eponine's description. I'd read it before, on Pinterest, and that's what made me decide to read the book. "But yet, despite all that, she was beautiful." Also, Cosette. She SO looks like she does in the movie. Amanda Seyfried is perfect. Also ENJOOOOOLRAAAAAS. Let me do a faint.
2. WHY DID FANTINE NOT SEE COSETTE BEFORE SHE DIED. I AM FURIOUS FOR EVER.
3. The barricade boys are purty cool.
4. EPONINE. I LOVE HER. The way she bites her lip. (Reminds me of a certain someone who knows who she is.) AND SHE DIED FAAAR TO QUICKLY. I wanted more Eponine and less Cosette sometimes. Although, don't get me wrong I like Cosette.
5. Cosette and Marius were pretty darn cute. Yes it's feverishly soppy, and Betram Wooster would vomit, but it's SO adorable. WHEN THEY ARE MARRIED AND SO HAPPY LIKE THEY CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE IT. Just, awwww.
Some random things that annoyed me to death:
1. I DO. NOT. want to read 20 chapters about the Battle of Waterloo. (Though it was cool recognising the names of the places, because I live in Waterloo, so yeah.) IT'S DEATHLY BORING.
2. I am NOT interested in school essays about Paris.
3. NO I DON'T WANT TO READ THAT LETTER ABOUT THE BISHOP'S HOUSE. I don't want 'a better idea'.
4. I mocked Victor Hugo whenever he said stuff like, 'To give you a better idea...' (I went: NOOO I GET IT ALLREADY.) and (he said this often): 'As it has been mentioned before...' (I went: NO DON'T TELL ME AGAAAAIN.)
5. Seriously. I skimmed SOOOO eternally much. I have spent these last days clicking on 'next page' on my kindle. It's all I've done, basically. (Sliiight exaggeration there, but still.) THIS BOOK IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO TOO LONG. *sweats* I'm relieved I'm finished, I must say.
6. Also, it's FAR to miserable. Everyone dies, basically, and everyone's hungry. I think Victor Huge decided to kill everyone off because it was the only way to make them not miserable. Or maybe he had the same problem as Diana Barry - he didn't know what to do with them.
I will finish off with a quote from the book, which kind of describes my negative points:
"... he had nothing to he eat; he remembered that he had not dined on the preceding day either: this was becoming tiresome. "
It was epic though. And it had it's beautiful parts.
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